bonk~bonker~bonkersz~bonkerderszzzz

I went to one of the local council today, submit a CF application. The CF application is for the extension of canopy roof for an existing factory. The factory itself already got the CF, and the owner want CF for the extended canopy as well. Normally, it’s not compulsory for a canopy to have CF. ( I asked about this before, one lady at building department told me they normally do not give out CF just for canopy, but if the owner insists, they will give). Ok, for a typical CF application for a premis (office, housing scheme, factory, warehouse bla bla) you need to prepare few things such as the forms, letter to each deparment involved and most impotant photos for the items in the checklist given by each of the departments. (eg. Building department- front, side, back view of premis, refuse chamber, guard house Planning dept - signboard, flags, toilets, pantry, parking space and numbering Engineering dept. - road signs, drainage sumps, existing drain, Landscape dept. - trees, flowers) and submit is at the One Stop Centre (OSC -a department where you submit all the plans, bla bla.. and then they will distribute the relevant documents to the department involved) Ok, I referred to the checklist given, but all the items in it have nothing to to do with the canopy, so I thought nevermind, I just prepared photos showing the canopy then is enough, no need the checklist. (If use the checklist, what to tick? None of the item is for the canopy) Damn it I was wrong!! Here’s what happened :

… satu kosong empat lapan kaunter 7 (my number kena!! wah lao! :D) so I went to the kaunter

Me : Hi Manis, I nak submit for CF application. (Ok, I didn’t said ‘Manis’. She’s not manis either.. bit bitter I think haha!)

Lady : Untuk projek aper?

Me : Extension of canopy untuk kilang sedia ada kat … bla bla bla..

Lady : Uh? Canopy jer? Kilang dah ada CF? Tapi kalau canopy jer biasa tak payah submit.

Me : Ya, kilang dah ada CF. Er, owner nak ada CF untuk canopy.

Then the lady checked the documents - forms, photos, letters everything..

Lady : Mana checklist Jabatan Perancang?

Me : Oh, I checked, takder item yang berkaitan, so I tak sertakan.

Lady : Em, tunggu jap ye, I call bangunan jap.

She called this one big shot at building dept.. two of them bla bla bla la.. for few minutes..

Lady : Handsome, kena ada checklist dari Jabatan Perancang juga dan kena prepare gambar yang diminta dalam checklist, untuk Perancang dan Bangunan sekali.

Me : HaaaaaaaaaaarghhHH!! Tapi, saya submit untuk canopy saja, kilang dah ada CF, buat apa nak gambar yang lain lain? Tak kan saya kena sertakan gambar surau.. tandas, ofis kalau saya apply CF untuk canopy bukan kilang?

Lady : Ini prosedur encik. Kena ikut.

Me : Em, boleh saya cakap dengan yang in-charge CF kat Jabatan Bangunan?

Lady : Ok, saya call you cakap dengan dia.

She called and passed the line to me.

Big shot lady : Selamat pagi.

Me : Selamat pagi puan, Ye nak tanya sikit, berkenaan CF submission ini.

Big shot lady : You nak submit CF untuk apa ni. Kilang?

Me : Untuk canopy

Big shot lady : Canopy saje? Kilang dah ada CF? Pelan dah lulus? (Fark, if not yet lulus I wont submit in la tolol…)

Me : Ya sudah lulus. Kilang dah ada CF. Lepas tu owner buat extension canopy pada kilang, and dia nak CF untuk part canopy tu. So saya submit gambar gambar canopy sahaja boleh tak?

Big shot lady : Tak boleh. You kena prepare gambar gambar kemudahan lain, tandas, penanda jalan, surau.. bla bla. Kita nak tengok gambar gambar itu juga.

Me : Tapi, kilang dah ada CF, pihak bangunan dah pergi buat inspection masa CF application, kali ni untuk canopy saja pun kena submit balik gambar gambar yang lain selain canopy?

Big shot lady : Ye kita tahu dah ada CF, kita tak akan inspect apa yang dah existing kat site, cuma kita nak simpan sebagai rekod.

Me : Kalau tak inspect yang existing, tak perlulah nak gambar gambar yang lain. Gambar canopy saja cukuplah puan. Rekod? Bukan ke masa apply CF untuk kilang, kita dah bagi bangunan dua set gambar bangunan, dah ada lah gambar surau, tandas, kebuk sampah..

Big shot lady : Itu lain. Fail lain lain, ini kita nak satu fail. Nanti ada apa apa berlaku kat you punya canopy kita boleh refer. (wtf she’s saying? canopy.. canopy la.. what refer other photos?)

Me : Memang lah lain lain fail puan. Ini kira dua submission, tak ada kena mengena lah..Kalau ada apa apa berlaku pada canopy, puan refer fail dan gambar canopy, kalau ada apa apa berlaku pada bangunan, puan refer fail dan gambar bangunan. CF pun lain lain kan?

Big shot lady : Ini prosedur. Kalau nak submit kena ikut prosedur

Me : Tapi…

Big shot lady : Ini prosedur… ini prosedur… (chanting.. )

In the end I decided not to submit…Procedures.. procedures my ass… everytime procedure. Dont think they even understand what are the procedures for…Procedures were created in the first place to facilitate a process of doing things and make do things easier, not creating obstacles..

I went to Genting Highland last weekend. And tell you what, I’m so farking generous!! I donated few hundred ringgits to Uncle Lim and a camera to somebody…Yes! I lost my money.. and my camera.. what a way to spend my weekend. Went there by bus, after booked for this Free and Easy package. Not bad, for RM221, you get a room to stay, 2 tickets to watch a magic show, 2 tickets for Genting Skyway, buffet coupons, discount on Theme Park rides The day we arrived about 2pm, it was raining heavily, so couldnt enjoy the Outdoor Theme Park rides… Nothing to do, I dragged myself into the Starworld casino, put some money into the slot machines, killing time..waiting for the magic show to start.. The magic show was ok ( I never really watch a magic show before, the last time I watch a magic show.. was at this street.. this old man peddling his medicines, massage oils bla bla.. :D) Er, it’s stimulating to watch pretty girls dressed up in Egyptian costumes and dancing around, shaking their bon bon.. muahahahaha! The next day, went for the theme park rides, took damn lot of photos.. videos.. bla bla bla… lunch time.. After took my lunch, snap more photos, got this cultural dance perfomance at that time.. so I took some photos of the hot and sweet girls.. then, plan to go back KL. But before that, I decided to give it a try at the casino.. which was a bad decision.. :( Because we already, checked out from the hotel we stayed, we had no place to put our luggage (couldnt bring it into the casino) so we put it at the locker next to the theme park. After putting the things, we walked to the casino.. and my gf asked "Ei, where’s the camera? With you ah?" to which I replied ‘ Em, in the paper bag I think.. already in the locker…’ and happily we went to ‘donate’ our money…. 2 hours after that, came out from casino.. ( Yes I donated few hundred ringgits to Uncle Lim), went to take our stuffs, taaaaa raaaaaaa!! No camera in the locker, checked the bags.. everything.. damn it, camera aku hilang!! My handsome photos!! Wonder if somebody out there is jacking off looking at those photos.. :D Haih… not a good day for me :(  My precious camera..

I feel like an idiot today. This is what happened. I went to open a saving account and apply for the ATM card as well this morning. After I got my passbook and ATM card, together with the pin code, I went to the ATM machine to change the pin code and proceed to do some transactions. 1st try - to transfer money to 3rd party account, failed. Ok.. 2nd try - check account balance, failed. Huh?? I went back to the customer service counter and was told that, I need to wait for few more hours for my ATM card to be activated. Ok fine, waited like 10 mins and I went back to the ATM machine. (got one urgent transaction need to be done mar… anxious lor..) Tried to check my account balance, ah great! It worked. So I proceed to transfer my money, and happily after finished the transaction, walked away and called my friend to tell him I just banked in his money…. then went back to my office.

10 mins after that…

Hmm, I feel like forgetting something… what is it ah?? Oh fark!!! My ATM card!! So I rushed back to the ATM machine, hoping that the card was still there.. Bad.. bad.. no card left at the machine, went to the counter and asked; nobody ‘kindly’ took my card and passed it to the staffs there. Argh!!!! So I need to reapply for my ATM card. Fark.. This is the most stupid thing to do, apply a new ATM card, and reported lost the next 10 minutes…

I wonder why I always forget things… Maybe it’s some kind of sign of more serious diseases? :D  Yeah, I always forget things..sometime the things are so simple.. that I myself never think that I can forget. Think of it it’s kinda silly.. let’s see what are the things that I did in the past, because of my forgetfulness..

1. Go to class without wearing underwear..

No.. I made that up muahahahahaha! Er, but that’s an idea eh? Should try it tomorrow when I go for work

Okay,

1. Riding my bike without wearing helmet

- This one time… no I think few times.. one of it was that I went to the post office, took off my helmet, put it on the chair.. and waited for my number to be called. Finished my business there, went to take my bike and vrooomm… went for evening class. Halfway.. passed this construction area, the road is dusty.. so I tried to cover my face.. and.. huh??? Where is my helmet? Fark.. I left it at the post office.. and I already traveled like 4-5 km.. about to reach campus already. Damn bodo thing to forget.

2. Forgot to take my bike after car-pooled my friend to campus.

Sometime I tumpang my friend’s car to campus. Normally on exam day, or I was lazy to ride my bike to campus. So I would ride to my friend’s house, parked my bike there, and took my bike when finished class. You see, on the way back from campus, we will reach my house first (my friend’s house is few streets down from my house) and I will asked my friend to drop me off at my house.. Selamba, came back from evening class, went to take my bath.. watch a bit of tv.. then went for dinner. At the door.. aik???? Where is my bike?? Cilaka.. forgot to take my bike.. left at friend’s house.. 

3. Forgot someone’s birthday, someone very close to me.

This sucks! This happened last year… I totally forgot the date on the actual day, and proceed to call her the next day, still thinking that,it was her bday (Get it? Her birthday is on 29th March, so last year, on the 29th March and I thought it was 28th March and did nothing, and on the 30 March, I called her to wish her ‘Happy Birthday!!’ Need not to say, I was blasted.. chopped to pieces when I said that. Things getting worse when I called to wish her happy birthday, she did not answer my call.. and I still didn’t know what happened at that time!!! I was thinking that, what la… jual mahal.. sulking again?? I called her 10 mins after midnight (I thought it was 29th March but actually 30th March) so I thought.. aik.. late 10 mins wish birthday also merajuk?? Little that I know, I did a terrible terrible mistake… After trying like 20 times calling her, she answered the call and I asked ‘Hey.. why dont want answer my call la??’ - still oblivious of the reason she was not answering my call. She just quiet, and said that she was going to sleep to which I replied, "Wah, I purposely wait after midnight to call you.. wish you birthday.. and you seems like not so happy…" .. .. .. … … … Cut the story short, I end up 3 hours on the phone explaining how the fark I mixed up the  whole things up.. (not forgetting for the 1st half an hour, I was defending myself "today is 29th, not 30th") Really… embarassing. I feel like shooting myself it the head and feed the brains to the pigs or dogs.. Hopefully this next 29 March I can redeem myself..  again.. sob sob sob….

These are just few of the things that I did.. when I was in my ‘forgetful’ mode… There are more.. but.. I’ll keep it to myself heh!

** This post may offend some of you guys of there, but why should I care?? :D Read and drop your comments or just get lost muahahhahahhaha!

This happened on last Sunday. I was having my dinner  at this one shopping mall food court. While I was eating, I detected a moving object not very far away, walking towards the table I was sitting… A delicious.. sexy.. hot mmmphhh.. what else?? Hot chick on the move.. So, as a true man will do (and as a great respect for the beautiful creation of GOD), I gave my fullest attention the lady… observing her.. oogling time yeah! :D  (Let’s call her Hottie Gurl.) Hottie Gurl wore a tight jean, white small t-shirt with long hair, pretty face + curvaceous body. I was enjoying my that sweet moment oggling Hottie Gurl when this ‘guy’ came to Hottie Gurl.. Oh no wait! ‘Guy’? More like girl with moustache! Fark!! Really, I could see her ‘moustache’ clearly and I was sitting like 3 metres away.. I nearly barfed out my nasi goreng pattaya.. Eheh, Miss Moustache and Hottie Gurl seems like a loving couple to me.. and they ‘pubicly’ displayed their affection of each other!! Fark.. Next thing I knew, Miss Moustache was holding Hottie Gurl’s hand and.. playing with her fingers.. looking at her ‘lovingly’.. those lovey-dovey stuffs you always see loving couple do. Serious!! Spoiled my mood for that day.. what a waste, a pretty.. young sweet thing prefer to not to have a guy to please her but a ‘lan ciao-less’ partner with moustache as her companion.. Haih..

Fark.. I just feel like ranting today,yes.. the reason is none other than that is because the price of oil increase again! And kanasai.. RM0.30! I dont farking care what the govt. tell the people .. bla bla.. shit to justify the move… And.. damn, I feel like being treated as some kind of idiots when I heard this "Still, comparing our oil price to other ASEAN countries, ours still the cheapest." That’s the biggest bullshit I ever heard. It is farking not true! (It’s only partially true) Let me tell you why.. (although I’m sure most of you already know..) Let us take our neighbour for the comparison - SIngapore. We always have the impression that the living standards in Singapore is very high… everything very expensive.. but.. that’s not very true.. Ok, oil price in Singapore is SD 1.62, compare to Malaysia, RM 1.92. If we convert to US dollar, for sure oil price in Malaysia is farking cheap. But, taken into account the buying power in Singapore is far more higher than Malaysia, that RM1.92 is nothing!! An engineer in Singapore, just graduated, roughly.. will earn about SD 2.4k per month, compare to their friends in Malaysia, about RM2k. (Average ok.. don’t give me the shit Intel or Motorola give you RM2.4-2.6k, not everyone earning that much when they start to work.. for instance.. ME!) So, comparing the earning power for the same profession in both countries, Malaysian.. clearly losing behind..Simple maths, just say Mr A in Malaysia and Mr B in Singapore, both earning the same amount of money in their respective currency - RM200.00 / SD 200.00 salary. Mr A pays RM 192.00 for 100 litres of oil, left with RM 8 while Mr B pays SD 162 for the same 100 litres of oil, balance SD 38. I doubt Mr A can survive his day paying for his lunch and dinner with that RM 8, while Mr B can last for a week with that SD 38..  And, some more price of goods in Malaysia far more expensive than Singapore. In Singapore, a toothpaste cost you SD 3.00++, in Malaysia RM 6.00! That’s double what we pay with what we earn compare to our Singapore friends. Food, about the same, KL Rm 4 - 5, Singapore SD 4-5 also, but again.. we earn less than what they earn. So, what the ‘we are still the cheapest mean???" Fark la.. somemore, by logic, we are oil-producing country, we have cheaper labour compare to Singapore which dont have oil like us.. we are still that expensive!!!!!!!!!! Not just oil, damn.. if I want to compare… shirts.. dvds.. shoes.. all the basic necessities, comparing price of the goods - our salary, I can say it out loud.. our stuffs are faaaaaaaarkkiiiiing expensive!!!!!!!! Something must be wrong along the system..Ok, I’m not being unpatriotic here, bashing my own country, but I just can’t help it. I love my country (yeah.. Stallone style..) that’s why I care.. Those who never care are the parasites.. sitting quietly.. like puppets! So, to whom it may concern, please dont say out loud with your smelly mouth that our oil price is cheaper than other countries, technically it’s cheaper.. but actually it’s not. Fark you for treating me like an idiot! Even my little niece know that 1.92 is a bigger number than 1.62 Remember, I NO IDIOT!!!

View this photo

I watched TV3 Buletin Utama just now and I saw this this news ‘ Usaha Malaysia banteras cetak rompak dipuji.. bla bla.. ‘. Then this one one minister - KPDN-HEP if not mistaken, talked about it, apparently he was highlighting our government and authority efectiveness in curbing piracy. I was like.. WTF? Banteras? Dipuji? My ass.. Look around, it seems more pirated vcds available than before what to puji? I think the minister never go to pasar malam, take a stroll to the shopping complexes.. O-MAI-GOD!! He’s so not in this world. Oh yea, cost for MRR2 repairing work is estimated at 40 million. FORTY FARKING MILLION!! About 10 million USD! not rupiah!! We might as well build a new flyover..That’s a good way to spend money

  I was organising the files in my computer, and guess what.. I have changed a lot!! Let’s see..

1983 - 2 years old

1985 - 4 years old

1998 - Form 4 - class photo taking session

1999 - Form 5, photo taken before went for prayer gathering

2000 - 1st year, UTM Skudai, in front of cafeteria

2000 - after football match session.

2001 - showing off my ‘assets’

November 2001 - I forgot why I pose like that

Disember 2001 - Supper time.

July 2002 - Miri mari punya orang..

July 2003 - Pangkor Island, showing off my.. you know, it’s so obvious

August 2003 - Mooncake Festival

Disember 2003 - Langkawi

May 2004 - Esplanade Miri

Ogos 2004 - Air Papan

September 2004 - Mooncake Fest.

Disember 2004 - Allan’s bday

Disember 2004 - FKA night

March 2005 - After football match

March 2005 - Final year gathering

August 2005 - Convocation

August 2005 - Convocation

31 Disember 2005 - New Year Eve

21 February 2006 - Taken just now

Damn.. Physically.. I’m more horizontally challenged now! Farking fat and boroi compare to last time.. I need to do something, warghhh!! warghhhhh!!! Aku tak hansooommm lagi!!!!!! Sob.. sob.. sob…

Hi guys! I was browsing through the friends list in my friendster just now and man, how I miss those moments when I was studying! Haha! Reading some of the updates my old friends put in their friendster, reminds me of the sweet memories and nostalgic moments! Especially during the period of 1994-1999 in Kolej Bujang, Miri. I was staying in the hostel and really, it was fun! I really enjoyed my life back then. I learned a lot of things.. (bad and good things of course haha.. er.. more bad?? But I still turn out not so bad woh.. hahah!)

Let me share one of the incident that still make me smile everytime I think of it. It was in the year of 1995, I was 14, Form 2 student. This one night, (most probably Friday or Saturday night) as usual after the prep study, me and friends hanged out at the verandah, talking craps. I couldn’t remember exactly what were the topics, but it shouldn’t be other than girls! haha! Young and horny boys hanging out together, what to expect yea? So we were talking.. somebody mentioned about this new girl in the school, Form 1 student, let’s call her Miss C. She’s quite lookable.. attractive for a young girl.. (ceeeeeeeeehhhhhhhh!! hey, dont underestimate my taste for woman at that young age..kah kah kah!) And, there was this guy, our friend, (let’s call him AJ) (not same group with us) was having this some sort of relationship with her. (ala.. that time.. tulis tulis surat.. bla bla that kind of relationship la..understood?) And, damn we were kepoh that time! One of my friend suggested that we went to this AJ’s locker and dig out the love letters and read it for fun! It was about 1-2am in the morning at that time, and most of the people in the domitory already slept, left only few of us still awake. So we agreed to this brilliant plan.. and we sneaked into AJ’s room.

Jeng jeng jeng.. everyone was so excited.. moving in the dark ala ala rambo towards AJ’s bed. His locker was locked, and we assigned one of us to ‘take’ the keys from his pocket/under his pillow.. (we didn’t know..). As we closing in to the target slowly.. few of us was crawling on the floor! and others tip-toed to his bed. Reaching his bed, I still remembered I was hiding below the bed (AJ was sleeping on double decker bed) with another friend, one of us on the lookout, and the other 2 searching for the keys. Then suddenly… POOOOooOTTTT !!! Sounded like a bomb! The only sound at that time.. on that peaceful..quiet night.. Cilaka! My friend next to me farted! Cheebuy.. Another friend which was on the lookout started giggling.. And Mr. Farter just smiled.. Everyone was going to laugh.. but still holding out, because of the important mission keh keh keh! So, resuming our mission, I joined the other two looking for the keys.. damn this AJ where he put his keys! Just as we were busy looking for the keys, then again.. POOOoooT!!.. silence…. POooooooooooooottttt… Pooooooooottttt…. PoooooOOOOTTTT! The guys just couldnt stop farting!! We started laughing and scared of people hearing us, especially AJ, we ran out and laughed the hell out… HAHAHAHAHA! Mission failed..blame his lousy digestive system. Anyway, we still managed to read the letters later. That will be another story wink! wink!

Sorry if the story make you bored, I’m not a good story teller, maybe it’s not funny for you either, but for me.. it was damn funny…considering I was there, experienced it… The farting sounds.. sic. ahahahaha… For my friends, ex-Kolej Bujang, especially those who was on the mission that night, if you are reading this, drop me a message will ya! Miss you guys. Take care!

Be your own boss, feel like a boss, walk like a boss, fark like a boss, eat like boss, smell like a boss yeah! (lame.. alright.. :D)

Don’t cha wish your bf smell like me babeh..

Just came back from work. Damn, jammed like fark outside there. Everyday like this is driving me crazy. Hmm, maybe it’s not that bad after all. We can package this and promote it to the world! Maybe Tourism Malaysia or tour operators can promote Kl like this "Welcome to Kuala Lumpur! Experience yourself the magical moment trapped in the highway, streets and everywhere in KL! Truly amazing and mind blowing experience. Discounts for early birds! Book now!" Not bad, should try this out Malaysia Boleh bah! haha! Er, the reviews will be like "Kanasai! Only in KL you can get this farking licking good experience! Jammed everyday! Truly unbelieveable. Tak percaya? Ka - ki try lar (Experience it yourself)"

  Taken from my condo. Can the the cars crawling..wtf..

Zoomed in.